I've got no cutesy pictures, no inspired words, no catchy phrases to go with this blog post. My hopes in writing this is to 1. share what the Lord has done/is doing in my life and 2. hopefully lift someone up who's been struggling with God's plan for their life.
Let's rewind to January 2014. For reasons that I'm choosing to keep private, I knew without a doubt that the Lord was stirring in my heart that it was time to move on from my current teaching position. Like I said, I'm keeping it private as to exactly HOW I knew that, but just trust me. It's between God and I anyway, right? So as soon as I knew it was time to leave, I began praying and praying for God to put me exactly where he wanted me to be. Did he want me in Metro? Did he want me in Murfreesboro? Public school? Private school? Elementary school? Middle school? I didn't care. Wherever God wanted me to be, I was game. (Note: I could still return to my old teaching job if another position didn't work out. I was just looking for something different.)
I interviewed for a school in late January kind of "under the table" because there weren't any open positions yet, but would be towards the end of the year. I waited and waited and prayed and prayed. This was the perfect school/situation for me (so I thought). Around the middle of April, I found out that they weren't able to offer me a position. I was DEVASTATED. But, Lord, this is where I wanted to be and I thought it was perfect for me... why wouldn't you put me there?! But alas, I trusted God that he had a purpose for it all and I moved on to other schools. (I later found out God's reason for me not being at this school... He's good y'all!)
This would go on for MONTHS. I would interview for a teaching job I thought I was perfect for and that I really wanted and I wouldn't get it. I just did not understand. I seriously went on at least 5 interviews and did not get those positions. What was going on?! I was exhausted, worried, nervous, and scared. The human in me was thinking "I'm a great teacher. I've got great TEAM evaluation scores. I'm highly qualified and trained. Why am I not getting these jobs?!" (The Lord later revealed to me the reasons why I didn't get all of those positions and he's still revealing some of the reasons. He was working on something bigger and better for me than anything I had dreamed for myself.)
I began to lose hope. It was summer now and most of the positions online were filled. However in the middle of June, I received an email asking me to interview at an elementary school in Murfreesboro. 5 minutes from my house. Where I actually went to elementary school at for 9 years. Where I still know some of the teachers at. WHAT?! Lord, is THIS what you had in store for me? Is this your plan?! I was so hopeful. I interviewed and then the next day the principal called me offering me a 1st grade teaching position. I gleefully and thankfully accepted that position, hung up the phone, and balled my eyes out. Then I praised God and have been praising him ever since for what He did in my life. (I couldn't announce that I had gotten the job until the beginning of July for HR reasons, but believe me I wanted to SCREAM it to everyone!!!)
So, the reason I write all of this is not to toot my own horn and show you how great I am. I hope you don't get that from this post. I write this to show you that sometimes things don't work out and our human brains are so confused. Why would God do that? Doesn't God want me to be happy? The answer is YES. Just wait. Things may not get better in the next day, month, or year. It took me over 6 months to see His plan for me unfold (and I know He's not done yet... He's got even more in store for me!). Don't lose hope. Keep praying. Keep being faithful. God will reward your faithfulness! I know how hard it is. I know how much you want to give up. Those 6 months were the hardest I've been through. But, I've seen the goodness of the Lord unfold in my life and I'm so thankful I stayed strong and faithful during that time!
Here are some songs that helped me during those 6 months of waiting. I would literally listen to these all. the. time. On the way to school, at school (before the kids got there), on the way home, while I was grading papers... all the time! If you haven't heard some of them, definitely check them out! (I've linked to each song on YouTube so you can listen!)
I hope that this post brings you hope or inspiration to stay strong. I've got an amazing testimony of God's faithfulness in my life and I'm so happy to share it with all of you! Keep praying for God's will in your life and stay strong. He will deliver you. Thank you for reading!
"The Lord is my light and salvation. Whom shall I fear? Whom shall I be afraid?"
-Elizabeth
